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| Hello, Old Friend |
Your mediocre BBQ sauce and molded meaty bone pattern by themselves are disgusting, but together? Somehow the combination creates an absurdity of flavor.
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| Oh Fuck... I'm going to regret this. |
You have a cheap, sometimes soggy, bun. It barely contains your slopping heaves of sauce.
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| Oh well, here goes. |
I normally don't like onions or pickles, but when they are liberally scattered on your glistening, mechanically separated hide, I devour them like like a 10$ whore giving a 100$ blowjob.
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| 1 Bite |
I told you last year McRib, that it was over. I couldn't see you anymore. But here you fucking are, sticking your porky flavored ass back into my business.
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| 2 Bites |
What the fuck McRib? If I buy you in as a Meal Deal, I can get a second one of you for only 1$? I fucking hate you McRib.
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| 3 Bites |
I know that your patty is made of restructured meat products. It just makes you more exotic. You can taste every bit of blended heart, stomach and salt.
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| 4 Bites |
I am nothing but patient McRib! Also, for some reason you are much more delicious after having been sitting out for an hour. There is no need to reheat you, McRib.
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| 5 Bites |
Almost every time I devour you I find a little chunk of cartilage that pops in my teeth. It makes me gag and I spit out the mouthful of you containing the chunk. Once the nausea passes, I finish you.
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| All gone in 5.5 Bites |
McRib...... I wish I never fucking met you. I am going to eat a second one of you and in return, I am going to get diarrhea.
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| The Fucking McRib |
I am never going to fucking eat you again McRib. Don't talk to me if I show up to get some McNuggets. Just pretend that we never met. I don't want to have to hate-fuck you ever again. It always ends badly.
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