Police Briefing: 8/24/2012
Good morning everyone, let's get this briefing done quick so we can all get out on the streets and start protecting people. Now then, first order of business, we received a bunch of those "Rate the NYPD" comment cards that the city has been giving out. Big trouble people! We got a bunch of 1 out of 10's on those comment cards. Do you know how that makes us look? I mean Officers, come on!
I want everyone giving 110% today! We need to score some 10 out of 10's on those comment cards, not these measly 1 out of 10's! So, for every jaywalking ticket you give out today, I want you to give out 9 more... 9 and 1 makes 10! 10's are what we are shooting for here people!
If you would normally give 1 speeding ticket, I want 10! Catch 1 robber? Not enough, 10! If you help 1 little old lady across the road, I need you to help 9 more! That's the way the game works now people! You know what? I am too damn excited to get started, let's skip the rest of the briefing and hit the streets!
Oh crap, most of you have already left. Oh well, I'll tell you guys and you just pass it on. This 10 out of 10 thing does not apply when you shoot someone. So, if you have to shoot 1 person today, you don't need to shoot 9 more. I mean, I would really prefer if you didn't. But for everything else, I am going to need that extra effort, capiche?