Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Diary Of A Degenerate 11

The next six days were touch and go. I figured I would never see Vanessa again, and I was probably unemployable. So I sat in my apartment and drank. I had 18 days left of rent and I was making the worst of them. She made a fucking mess of my place but I pushed the shards of broken dishes under the cupboard and walked along clean pathways through the kitchen, never giving a shit about the state of the place. But I eventually ran low on booze.

Frank was a good guy. He had loaned me $20 about six weeks ago and I never paid him back. He was either too big of a pussy to hassle me about it or he would never speak to me again. The only way to find out was by knocking on his door. He answered politely and let me in, we spoke about current events and the state of the economy for a few minutes, but he never mentioned owing him cash. I was able to convince him that I needed his money more than he did and he relented, so I walked out of his home thirty bucks richer. Just enough for a couple day's worth of booze. I converted his cash immediately into whiskey and didn't even bother hiding it when I got home and passed him in the stair well.

But when I got to my door I saw a message. "I have nowhere to go. I was afraid you rejected me but now I understand you just need distance. I respect that, I really do. If you can forgive me I will prove to you that I can be trusted. Really, I am ashamed at how I reacted when you have been nothing but good to me since I met you. I have a lot to make up to you but I am ready to prove myself if you can find it in your heart to let me back in. Please. Love, Vanessa"

I decided it would be better to get evicted and get on public assistance than to let that bitch back in my life, so I threw the note away. About two hours into my stupor on the couch the door started banging like a fucking madman. The landlady was on the prowl, already hunting for her rent even though it wasn't due for two weeks. She knew I was out of work and waiting for the inevitable, but fuck her anyway. We argued in the hallway until I slammed the door in her face, but not five minutes later she was pounding at door again. I opened it fast, ready to fist fight if I needed to, but It wasn't her. It was Vanessa.

"I'm sorry" She said. "I heard you yelling, and I spoke to your landlady and paid your rent. Cash. If you never want to see me again, I understand. But please, just please." She was more than a convenience fuck at this point, she was a resource. So I let her in.



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