The End of Natural Selection

For billions of years the earth has been in balance with itself, and has long sustained a constantly evolving biology driven by the variables of reproductive success. The ingenious way this is achieved is through the death or sterilization of the weakest among a given species' ranks. If every monkey but one was able to climb trees, he stood a higher probability of being eaten by predators. If a particular dinosaur was born with an uncontrollable urge to gnaw off it's own genitals then it was much less likely to breed successfully and pass along those undesirable genes. Then came mankind.

We have managed to overcome that natural balance and create a bountiful and lush environment for ourselves to rapidly reproduce. Where it is cold, we make warm homes. Where it is hot we air condition. And when someone is born with their brain and lungs on the outside of their body, we stuff them back in, sew them up, and send them to school to be educated. Not surprisingly this has given rise to some rather unfavorable genes still floating around in our society.

And before you get up on your high horse and accuse me of advocating genocide, I would like to to point out that this problem will have no consequence for humanity in any way. You see, in order for us to degrade our genepool to the point that we are no longer viable and become extinct we would need to survive many thousands and millions of years from now. We all know that we will either destroy the earth's ability to sustain us and we will starve, we will destroy all society and culture in world wars, or both, long before we suffer on evolutionary terms.

Want proof that natural selection is dead? I will provide several examples of modern body modification practices that have their roots in medieval torture, all with glorious pictures you can cringe at. If we are to the point of inflicting these atrocities on ourselves willingly, then we have retained genetic markers that should have long ago been selected out of the genepool.

We start with the most famous torture/execution method in history, crucifixion. You see, this method utilizes nails to suspend someone from a structure and cause their body weight to tear their flesh and leave them to suffer in agony. The modern equivalent is done with stainless steel hooks that pierce the skin, and is quite common among counter-culture groups.

Another torture practice is known as flaying and consists of the removal of the skin, usually in long strips. This is one of the more universally feared torture methods, for obvious reasons. But some body modification enthusiasts still pursue this horrible procedure. Although quite intricate and artistic, the scarification process makes my skin crawl (pun intended).

The act of quartering is basically the forceful removal of the limbs, usually after tying arms and legs to horses and setting them all running in different directions. This is a truly ferocious method of amputation and spells certain death for the accused. The modern equivalent is surgical amputation, from the toes (pictured here) to full limbs.

The final example is particularly brutal, and is known as "the pear of anguish". This contraption is inserted into the vagina or anus and cranked until the device blossoms, causing severe distention in the sensitive tissues and assuring infection. The same concept is applied regularly in the pornography industry, as well as in private sexual practices. It is interesting that this terrifying act has evolved into a pleasurable one, as indicated by her sincere smile.

So there you have it, readers. You have now been enlightened to the evolution of torture and it's implication on the decline of observed natural selection in the human race. There is no need to thank me, but you're welcome anyway.