|This hat gets me a discount at Arby's|
|Big Daddy Cain|
We finish the newsletter tonight with the most important issue to the conservative mind (besides opposing taxation, of course), the issue of when life begins. Every year we see amendments offered at the state level to redefine personhood to include uteruses that contain both an egg and sperm. This is absolutely ridiculous. It is insulting to the intellectual populace of this great country to deny the simple truth that life begins at first date. Many naysayers would try to point out that only a minute few of the first dates that occur result in actual pregnancy, but I ask them this: Are you willing to risk the life of a poor unprotected baby by being wrong on this subject? It is high time that we take to the streets to let the President know that we are sick and tired of him talking about jobs (boring!) and start getting down to the REAL issues like the definition of life!