Monday, October 15, 2012

The Orgasm Formula


There seems to be some confusion about how a man reaches orgasm when copulating with a significant (or insignificant) other. But I have some valuable information to help clear up the situation. By my calculation there are four elements that, when mixed in equal proportions, lead to a prompt and satisfying male orgasm. So take a few moments to review and improve your sex life.


Friction - Never to be underestimated, friction is the most important of the four components to a perfect male orgasm. In fact, this element alone is responsible for 90% of all male orgasms as a whole! The focus of the friction effort should be dedicated to the tip of the man meat, but some shaft pressure makes a welcome accompaniment to the experience. But we aim for a higher standard, a ball-rattling geyser of manjoyment. So read on, because there is so much more to learn.


Pain - Ask any man if he enjoys a little pain in his sex life and you will learn a lot about him from the response. If he says yes, then he is a road hardened traveler, an orifice-spelunker of considerable experience, and a man who has crossed the line of vanilla sexual action, marked his territory, and returned for seconds. If he says no, then you can be assured he is a virginal and boring character, perhaps in the grip of a guilt-laden religious prison, and almost certainly an unadventurous lover. To the ladies, consider this question when speed dating to weed out the boys from the men. In application the method of pain is limited only by your imagination. But the scale of safety goes like this: leather>wood>steel>fire.


Humiliation - Perhaps even darker territory than pain, humiliation ups the ante of sexual transgression by including elements such as diapers, leashes, and cross-dressing to increase testicular tension and ensure a forceful release. There methods are in seldom traveled territory, and when considering a partner there are two schools of thought: someone you know and trust with your life, the type of person you love and will keep a secret, or a complete stranger that you will never see again. Personally I prefer the latter.


Emotion - I consider this the "retarded half-brother" of the orgasm formula. This element matters more for some than for others, and usually takes the form of love and affection. But a cheaper and often overlooked alternative is gut-wrenching sadness! It is my opinion that you haven't experienced a truly satisfying orgasm until you have ejaculated while dual streams of snot and tears burn trails down your face. But to each his own!




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