Wednesday, August 17, 2011

Which is More Terrible? A Popular Irony Poll

DISCLAIMER:  This post is not for you.  That’s right, I’m talking to you.  I am going to go into detail about some pretty heinous acts in a rather cavalier way, and if you are going to be offended by that, the fuck off and don’t read this.  To our few loyal readers, tomorrow will be another day here at Popular Irony, and the darkness only comes once every few weeks or so.  Kinda like vagina bleeding.  That being said, there are links to the content discussed, but no graphic images will be forced on you.
We have four big contenders here, ladies and gentlemen.  You know the rules: read the descriptions, follow the links, or both.  Then cast your vote in the margin on the right!  And remember these links are legit, so viewer beware!
This gem takes us to a quaint rural setting in the Middle East.  We get to witness a rare coming of age ceremony, a boy’s first beheading.  A clearly pre-pubescent boy holds a knife in one hand, while a helping adult pulls the victim’s beard to keep the throat exposed.  The boy sets into the decapitation with enthusiasm, although he shows his inexperience by ineffectively hacking at the spinal column until the job is complete.  This one has some quality shock elements, with both a beheading and child abuse!
This entry shows the Mexican Drug Cartel’s penchant for oneupsmanship, with a rare beheading performed by a female, and a close –up unbroken 6 minute demonstration on how to skin the face off of a head.  After the job is done the perpetrators give the head a close up and open it’s eyelids.  Creepy with quality camera work.  The cartels clearly have better access to technology than the Middle East fundamentalists (not surprisingly).
If you have any interest at all in terrible videos, you already know this one.  The infamous 3 guys 1 hammer video.  The link will get you more information on the back story, but here is the gist:  a group of Ukranian middle-class kids around 17 years old killed 21 people in one month.  This video shows the brutal bludgeoning and stabbing of a man in a ditch.  This one is the favorite to take it all.  Here’s an excerpt of the dialog translation:
“Kill him already.”
“I already put the hammer back. He’s already dead.”
“I poked out his eyes and he’s still not dead” says the cameraman
“Get the knife” cameraman continues
*Proceeds to bludgeon him*
I have high hopes for this one.  It is not nearly as graphic as those above.  In fact, there is no blood in this video at all.  But the audio is excruciatingly disturbing.  Two men chase a third down and essentially stomp his head repeatedly, leaving him to die a slow death.  I don’t know the back story here, but it is in Russia (surprise!) and it seems like the victim is wearing a wire due to the audio quality.
Now stop masturbating, and get to voting!

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